Below The Belt

I asked on my facebook page a few days ago for questions and topic suggestions, when this particular--eh hem--topic came up again. By far, this has been my most requested topic to date: resculpting horse genitalia.

I’m going to cover the different genders separately. Ironically, I first thought about this as a topic because of the number of customs I’ve seen where the artist managed to combine both genders on one model. Yes, hermaphrodite horses are running amok in our hobby.

No picture I could put here would be appropriate.

Obviously, this is somewhat of a delicate topic. The model horse world is full of a lot of young kids, most of whom haven’t grown up on a farm or been exposed to animal husbandry. Even amongst us adults, an understanding of the birds and bees doesn’t equate to knowledge of sheaths and udders. Horse parts not only look dissimilar from ours but they are in completely different and surprising locations.

I’m sure I’m not the only one too afraid to Google “horse genitalia” without a bottle of eye bleach nearby. In the interest of sensitivity, I’m going to try to keep the dirty jokes to a minimum. My close friends will be able to tell you this is a herculean feat for me as I rarely pass up the opportunity to tell stories that would make a pirate blush.

Capt'n Jack Brighty by Sommer Prosser

The Breyer and Stone companies--God bless ‘em--have done little to clear up confusion. First, there were the old Breyer models. At best, you can hope for shapeless, seam-covered blobs, completely open to interpretation.

G1 Morgan "Stallion"


Mesteño


Proud Arabian Mare

Sham

With the founding of Stone and as Breyer introduced more detailed sculptures, we entered an era where you could actually tell a stallion from a gelding. It was a giant leap forward in the realm of model horse male reproductive organ sculpting. However, as you might expect, the mares were still being overlooked:

There is supposed to be something here and here. There is not.

And my Ruffians need dusting again.

The Stone company responded by introducing factory custom mares with proper udders. However, they often did this by grinding off the sheath of a stallion, leaving the testicles to simulate udders.

Plastic models aren’t perfect and none of this would be a big deal if Stones and Breyers weren’t the primary reference source for sculptors. I’ve done it, you’re done it--we’ve all referenced Breyer bits at one point or another when trying to sculpt or improve the bits on our custom models. Frankly, it’s practical to reference a model when you don’t have access to the real thing, and the alternative is a entering the hellmouth to the internet known as Google Image Search.

Om nom nom

As an alternative to that, the thumbnails below all go to large, high resolution (but tasteful!) images of mare bits. They are big photos, so I wouldn’t recommend opening them at work.

Next week, I will add girly bits to a plastic Breyer mare. I’ll also talk about variation amongst udders and other “high school health class” topics like lactation and heat cycles. A fun time will be had by all.